4 Myths About Healing You Need to Know

Although healing my past has been the most rewarding journey, I didn’t always see it that way. 

For the first few years of therapy, trauma-informed research, deep-dive personal development courses, or experimenting with psychedelic medicine with the intent to look deeper within myself and heal, I felt stuck and often frustrated. 

Every time I felt that I was moving in the right direction, around the corner was yet another challenge to face, another layer to peel off. It seemed as if addressing my past and healing my heart was more difficult than not doing it. 

However, anytime I thought of quitting and letting this self-love and healing mambo jumbo concept go, I couldn’t. Deep down, I knew I was on the right path to fulfill the inner longing that inspired me to look within and, spiritually speaking, get my hands dirty. 

Knowing I am stuck on this path for as long as I need it, I asked myself, “Is there a different way to perceive my healing process while looking at it with more gratitude and hopefulness?” 

I realized that my expectations of emotional healing were unrealistic, stemming from a desire to avoid feeling my emotions while rushing through the process. 

Therefore, I decided to be honest with myself and look at some of the lies or myths I believed about healing. 

Myth #1 Healing is all about sunshine and rainbow

When you hear or read words like emotional healing, self-love, self-worth, healthy boundaries, etc, these phrases represent the positive and empowering state of being. But when you put them into practice, the learning curve that comes with it will challenge you. 

Imagine that you never rode a bike. The first time you ride it, you may be scared, uncertain, and even hurt if you fall off because you lose balance. The same applies to new behaviors you are trying to adapt or wounds you want to heal to live a healthier and more empowering life. 

Eventually, when you learn to take better care of yourself and develop a healthy sense of self-worth (or anything else you are healing), life will truly feel like sunshine and rainbows everywhere. 

Myth #2 Healing empowers you

It absolutely does. 

But first, it makes you feel vulnerable, confused, and in doubt. 

You are navigating a new road, and let’s be honest, uncertainty often doesn’t feel empowering. 

When you uncover feelings you buried for years or learn to set boundaries and stand up for yourself, vulnerability, confusion, doubt, and fear are natural byproducts of the process. 

Therefore, the best thing you can do to empower yourself in those situations is to welcome these emotional states with compassion and curiosity. Your primary urge may be to turn away, numb, or get busy. I certainly know it was mine, too. But when you decide to withstand the discomfort of change and emotional pressure, it will transform into the empowerment you are seeking and expecting to feel. 

Myth #3 Healing is beautiful

The results of healing are beautiful, but the process itself can be uncomfortable. We often experience the most profound growth under pressure and discomfort. 

One way to navigate those not-so-beautiful parts of this journey is to walk through it consciously, not compulsively. 

Let’s say you are feeling the rushing fear of setting a boundary with a family member. If you give in to your emotions and react compulsively, you probably overthink it and never get around to it while feeling resentful. 

What if, instead, you acknowledge your fear, get curious about it (let’s say you fear rejection), and then refocus on why you decided to set a boundary in the first place? You remind yourself that you weren’t taught what setting boundaries even means and how much stress, people-pleasing, and subtle anger it brought. Then, you recognize the (beautiful) part of what it means to live in your power and respect your boundaries by asking others to do the same. 

Myth #4 You are healing because there is something you need to fix

This perspective creates tremendous pressure that something is wrong with you when it isn’t. You don’t heal because you need to fix something about yourself. You are healing so you can find your way back to wholeness that was there all this time. 

This is why we often refer to healing as peeling off the layers. These layers are experiences and memories that shape certain limiting beliefs or create blocks that distort your perception of who you are at your core. Through healing, you break through those limits and experience a profound wholeness and love. 

Therefore, remember, you are not broken, and don’t need to fix anything about yourself. You are just perfect, and your healing is a path for you to recognize it. 

Which one of those myths is the most common for you, and are there any others you believe to be true? I’d love to know. Feel free to share it in the comment section below.